FAQing Hostile:
          Subcultural Mutant Otaku Versus the Mundanes
                           Chapter 21
                     By Shan "scourgey" Lakhmani

        (Twoflower is to blame for this relentless insanity)

The Moon glowed softly above, without a care. Unlike the frantic otaku
under her gentle, loving face.

"5h3rm4n! H0w f4r 4r3 w3 fr0m th4t w4ck0 w0m4n 4nd h3r g00n5?"
B1ff nervously asked Sherman. His face looked drawn and weary, and
he looked as if he would have fallen asleep at any moment.

"We have traveled exactly two hundred and forty-two point twenty seven
miles away from Evanston" said Sherman mechanically.

"We have to get back to K1bonia and tell the Father Ass-master what
has happened to Evanston's relic" announced Zirconia.

Rachael was looking after her brother's wounds, and Zirconia was
helping her bandage him. Zirconia's face looked worried, tight,
and drawn. Nick was asleep, but he looked uncomfortable due to
the fact that Zirconia put so many bandages on him that he
looked like a mummy.

"Vixen, which tribe are we going to?" asked Dave.

Dave was applying bandages, and putting various ointments on Evan's
shoulder. Vixen volunteered to and removed the bullet from Evan's
shoulder earlier. She knew she couldn't live with herself if she
let Dave take the bullet out of Evan's shoulder.

She couldn't let anyone suffer like that.

"err... I'm not sure, Sherman who are we going to meet?" answered Vixen.

"We are headed toward the outpost of the Elvii tribes in the area once
known as Tennessee" replied Sherman.

Rachael turned pale, well paler, once she heard the tribe name as did
Vixen and B1ff. Vixen started breathing raggedly and fearfully said

"Kami-sama preserve us, Megami-sama protect us from this evil" as
B1ff decided now would be a nice time to take his nap as his eyes
rolled to the back of his head and he fell to the ground. Rachael
decided just to shudder and continue working on Nick, while
Zirconia gave them all a questioning look with Dave.
Evan and Nick were unable to respond due to obvious reasons.

"What's so bad about the Elvii?" Dave asked, with question marks
over his head

Vixen replied with a a vein pulsing on her forehead "BAKA! They are
EVIL! PURE EVIL! They sing the songs of ultimate pain and torture
as well as blind their enemies with shining suits that stun the
opposers of the style of music of their god, Elvis!"

"I'm sorry, I didn't know, but these guys sound like people
my parents would like." Dave, with a sweatdrop adorning his
head, apoligetically replied.

"Just be prepared. Zirconia! that kid's wound tighter than
ribbons on a magical girl, so go research the Elvii and fill
in Dave, Dave, you go help that ear, and will someone get B1ff
off the floor! I'm going up top to get a breath of fresh air"
Vixen ordered as she climbed out onto Sherman's surface, slightly
wincing at the metaphor she used.

				*****

Zirconia decided that her fantastic, and that term is being
used loosely, medical skills were no longer needed, that she
would research the enemy, or in other words the Elvii.

"Sherman, please access information on the Elvii" ordered
Zirconia. She wondered wha was so bad about the Elvii to
stir such a reaction from her compatriots.

"Accesing files... File Found" announced Sherman, "The
Elvii are a tribe who worship the singer known as Elvis,
a singer of the styles known as Rock and Roll, as well as
gospel, love ballads, and other forms of music. The Elvii
are broken up into various tribes, including The Circle
of the Rhinestone suit, Blue Hawaiians, and the very
unpopular Singers of the Word,"

"Singers of the Word? that doesn't sound so bad"
said Zirconia.

"They all currently reside if various parts of the
area known as Tennessee and their center of Base
is in a location known as New Graceland, It is
advised for one to stay away, but if need to go,
excercise extreme caution" Sherman completed.

"I don't get it, what's everyone afraid of of?" wondered
Zirconia as she decided to get some sleep, and went off
to her sleeping quarters.

				*****

Phreakachu was away in the storage room, smoking the
packs of cigarettes he 'liberated' from Evanston.
He sighed as he finished the next to last cigarette
in the pack. He reached into the box, for the last cigarette
and he found an odd object in his pack.

"Pika pi?" wondered Phreakachu. He pulled it out.

"PIKA!? Pi pika chu chu pi pika?!" he also said aloud as he
gazed at the object in his hand.

				*****


Vixen was lying down between two turrets, just enjoying
herself. The wind in her hair, the all forgiving moon,
the pleasant feeling of the tank rumbling as it moved,
and the slight gunpowdery smell in the air due to the
weapons all calmed her down.

The problem was, it made her remember the past, it made her
remember her neighbors, her family, most of all, it made
her remember why she had to unmask a part of herself
she tried to lock away forever.

The sickeningly sweet Sailor Vixy.

				*****

Vixen sees herself as she was when she was younger.
She was always tormented by the other girls, teased about not
playing Sailor Moon, Lina Inverse, or some other feminine
anime power figure. Because those games are all girls her age
play, she didn't have many friends, but she had Biff. Her
Brother never let her down. He would graduate from Juuban High in
a few months. She didn't know what job he might take.
Her parents said they would support any decision he made.
Her Father asked her if she would join the Washuu-chan
science circle.

She wasn't planning on joining the ranks of the few, the proud, and
the sexless.

She was interested in killing things, so the Army seemed like a great
place to end up. Who knows, she used to think back then, maybe Biff
might be there with her. He seemed interested in fighting for the
Otaku way. He was really interested in hentai studies, but she
always thought that it was a phase.

				*****

She sees herself as she was, right before the experiment. She was a little
young for Senshi genetic training, but still usable. The scientists said
they would draw power from her innermost thoughts, and her inner struggle
of concious. She told them before her body was bombarded with rays of
various powers that she wanted to be able to destroy as many enemies
as possible in shortest amount of time. She wanted to be the best.
They said her Senshi powers would come when all hope was lost,
or controlled with the henshin stick they gave her.
From the moment she yelled those fated words, "Vixy Sugar Power!" and
transformed into the hideously cute Sailor Vixy, She saw what she
became. In her quest of power to become the ultimate warrior, she had
become a saccharine pumped superheroine.

She became powerful, but she became what she hated most.

She realized that true power came from one's self, and not a genetic
tune-up. Unleashing this malevolence from inside of herself is what it took
for to start to look to herself for the power.

				*****

She still harbors a sickness within her soul, a power that came with a 
price.
She still wars with the power inside her, fearing when her mind is not her 
own.
She still hasn't forgiven the people who did this to her. She will never 
forgive.

Vixen hated dealing with these memories, they always made her feel angry,
depressed, and vulnerable at the same time. She hated being vulnerable.

A creak sounded on the wind and brought to attention a pale young girl
coming from below deck in Sherman.

"Hey Vixen, do you mind if I joined you, I was starting to feel cramped in 
there"
said Rachael as she climbed out onto Sherman's surface.

"Whatever" said Vixen, smiling a little for copying the Goth's phrase.

Rachael walked across Sherman's surface, settled herself and sat close to
Vixen. A little too close in fact...

"I've always loved the night, the quiet it brings, the safety of the 
darkness"
Rachael whispered in awe. The moonlight gave her a beauty previously unseen, 
the
deceptive beauty only the Moon can bring.

Vixen was starting to feel a little uncomfortable, "it is beautiful" she 
said
trying to mask the trepidation she was beginning to feel.

"The stars remind me of the eyes of someone I know" said Rachael wistfully.

"They do?" answered Vixen. She started getting really nervous.

"That person's very special to me" said Rachael. Her eyes were almost 
shining.

"Vixen, how do you feel about me?" continued Rachael, staring at Vixen with
her shining, beautiful eyes.

"She has beautiful eyes..." thought Vixen, "Wait! what am I thinking, Just
answer her question! The way she stares at me... I can't lie to her!" Vixen
continued in her mind while trying to answer without making a fool of 
herself.

"So? What so you think of me?" prodded Rachael.

"I... like you, you seem to be a good person, dependable, intelligent and
a general pleasure to have on the team" Vixen finally answered. "Does 
Rachael
know that every one of these words are true, or does she think I'm lying to 
her"
Vixen thought to herself. Rachael seemed satisfied, for the moment anyway.

"Thank you, Vixen.   I really like you too" said Rachael, her hand reaching
out for Vixen's hand. Her hand reaches its target in seconds.

Vixen felt Rachael's hand hold hers, "oh shit"

				*****

She started moving slowly around him, lustilly taking of her blouse,
slowly she cupped her hand on his chin and gave him a light kiss on the 
cheek.
Then she reached behind her back and she...

"PIKA PIKA!" yelled Phreakachu, as he rudely awakened B1ff.

"Phr34k, unl355 y0u h4v3 C4rr0t 4nd th3 M15u 515t3r5 c0v3r3d 1n ch0c4l4t3
4nd wh1p cr34m 1n th4t c1g4r3tt3 p4ck3tt, 1 d0n't c4r3 wh4t y0u f0und"
said B1ff, stifling a yawn.

"Chu ka pi pika" said Phreakachu, pulling out a black box.

"Wh3r3 th3 h3ll d1d y0u g3t th15!" exclaimed B1ff.

"Pi ka pika chu" said Phreakachu pulling out another packet and getting
a cigarette.

"W3 5h0uld t3ll 515" said B1ff.

"Chu pi pika?" asked Phreakachu holding a paw out to B1ff.

"5ur3" said B1ff, lighting Phreakachu's cigarette.

				*****

(hours later (bedtime))

Rachael comes down off the top of Sherman with Vixen in tow. B1ff barely
waits a second after she appears, then pulls out the black box and says
to his sister,

"L00k wh4t Phr34k f0und!"

"How did you get that!?" asked Vixen, so mucch in shock that she fell onto 
Rachael
and got herself tangled in Rachael's limbs, making her more embarassed than
she already was.

B1ff was so excited about the box that he didn't notice the girls' accident,

"Phr34k f0und 1t 1n th3 c1gg4r3tt3 p4ck h3 5t0l3 fr0m 3v4n5t0n"

"What was it doing there?" Rachael wondered aloud.

"Someone probably hid it while Evanston was being taken over" rationalized 
Vixen.

"In a pack of smokes?" said Rachael asked disbelievingly.

"Maybe that person was a smoker" answered Vixen.

Dave comes in dragging Evan by the legs. Evan was starting to get up, but
Dave accidently smacked Evan's head against the doorway, knocking the kid
out again.

"Vixen, where should I put Evan?" asked Dave.

"The ear? He's your responsibility, he sleeps with you" commanded Vixen.

"Okey dokey, Come on Evan"  Dave said as he dragged Evan to his and 
Rachael's
sleeping quarters.

				*****

Rachael and Dave look at each other longingly. Not knowing what to say,
not knowing what to do, hearts aflutter, sweaty palms, and weak legs.

"Thanks for not leaving me at Evanston" Rachael told Dave, her voice
nervous.

"I- urr... We couldn't leave you, you're part of the team" said Dave,
equally nervous.

They looked into each other's eyes, Rachael tried to look away but
couldn't, Dave had her mesmirised, looking into those warm caring
eyes of his. Years of Goth training tried to get her to stop this
madness, but another voice told her to continue. Dave, the kid she
first saw at the haunted house in Disney Land had changed, had grown
into something more. Their faces started getting closer and...

The entire Tank shaked as if hit by a missle. "I apoligize for this
inconvenience, we have hit a natural rock formation on ground. No
repairs necessary" announced Sherman

Mood shattered Dave said "I've got to put Evan to bed, Good Night Rachael"
He smiled at her befor he went to his side of the room and put Evan's body
near his own, and he lay down to sleep.

Dave thought to himself "Should I tell Vixen I toss and turn in my sleep?"

				*****

Darkness is all that's seen. His eyes slowly adjust to the darkness and he
weakly looks around himself, for his enemy. He turns his side, and ends up
face to face with Dave, noses almost touching. He feels great anger, 
disgust,
and horror at being this close to his hated enemy. He decides to change
sides and see what's on his other side, and He sees a girl with dark hair,
a skimpy outfit, and... he started turning red at the thought of the last 
object.

"Wait, I think I can see a..." was Evan's last thought before he blacked
out again. This time for sensory overload.

				*****

Vixen woke up to the sound of music. Bad music.

"Sherman, where are we?" asked Vixen.

"We currently are at the area known as Blue Memphis"

"Oh megami-sama!" she said in horror.

She went to B1ff's sleeping area and kicked him until he awoke.

"Why d035 3v3ry0n3 w4k3 m3 4t th4t p4rt?" he asked while trying to
convince Vixen to stop hurting him.

"Why didn't you change our course, you BAKA!" said Vixen with multiple
veins popping out on multiple places.

B1ff sweatdropped, "1 th0ught y0u d1d"

"Might as well get supplies" said Vixen, resisting the urge to throttle her
brother where he stood.

				*****

Vixen, B1ff, and Phreakachu went out to get supplies. Vixen decided if She
suffered, B1ff would too. Phreakachu was up, and Vixen took him too, just
because she was in a bad mood. Phreakachu decided he would need to focus
on one of his various addictions. He decided a shot of heroin, and five 
packs
of cigarettes would be fine. Zirconia and Nick got up at the last minute,
insisted on coming, and held up the departure for ten minutes.

Finally they left their tank and went exploring for a merchant. Blue Memphis
was filled with odd people. The women dressed in long skirts, petticoats, 
and
bonnets, or they wore grass skirts and coconut bras. The guys all wore 
Hawaiian
shirts, and white pants. One other thing linked the men togrther, they all
sported badly died black hair.

Vixen saw a sign over one of the doors meaning supply seller. "Hey everyone!
foods here, let's buy stuff and get out of here."

They all enter what appeared to be a normal grocery store except for the
banners of elvis everywhere. There were only three other people in that
store, the clerk, a man wearing all black, which didn't look inconspicuous
considering the floor and walls were white, and a man dressed like a clown,
complete with pie, reading a book.

Vixen and B1ff went shopping through the aisles while Nick convinced
Zirconia to talk to the clown.

"Uh, sir why are you wearing a clown suit?" Nick asked the man with the
large red nose and the colorful hair.

"Shrouded in night are my ways..." he cryptically said.

Zirconia gasped, "It is the way of K1bo"

The Clown looked delighted, well more delighted, and spouted another
confusing phrase, "Arduous our tasks, unseen by mortal eye..."

Nick finished what the clown said, "Unknown our might or tasks, For that
is our way! You're a K1boist!"

"That I am, young ones" answered the Clown.

"Are you going to go back to the home base any time soon?" asked Zirconia.

"Yes, Why?" answered and asked the clown.

Nick replied for his sister, "we have dire news to tell the council"

"I can take you now, if you wish" offered the Clown.

"Sure, let's just go say goodbye to our companions"

				*****

"ITAI! There's almost nothing in these glass refrigerators" cursed Vixen.

Phreakachu was on his last cigarette of the first pack.

Nick and Zirconia ran towards Vixen and B1ff.

"Hey guys! we found another K1boist!" announced Zirconia.

"Yeah, he offered to take us back to report to the council" finished Nick.

"50, 1 gu355 th15 m34n5 G00dby3" said B1ff.

"I guess so" said Zirconia as she held up a pair of B1ff's boxers,
"but I'm keeping these" and she left with Nick.

Vixen glared at B1ff, "1'll g0 4w4y n0w" said B1ff fearfully

"Do that" said Vixen in an angry yet restrained voice.

"Pikachu" saif Phreakachu and decided to join B1ff.

				*****

"Whaddya mean Eighty-Two Elvoids! What's an Elvoid!" yelled Vixen in such a 
rage
that B1ff thought she might literally explode.

"Local currency, no money, no food, but I am willing to trade" answered the 
clerk.

"Err... What do you want?" asked Vixen.

"Got any smokes? They're rare here, three packs for all that food" asked the 
clerk.

"Phreakachu, you will give this man three packs of cigarettes" stated Vixen.

"Pika" said Phreakachu, shaking his head.

Vixen picked up Phreakachu and started squeezing him. His electric attacks 
were
insulated by her clothing.

"Now" stated Vixen.

Phreakachu complies.

"Thank You, Come again" said the clerk.

				*****

Dave is continuing to apply fresh bandages and new ointment
when Evan awakes... again. He looked at Dave, and tried to reach
his arms around Dave's, but stops because of the pain in the arm
with the bullet wound.

"I'll kill you yet, Dave!" he said weakly.

"Great! you're up" said Dave cheerfully and completely unphased
from Evan's verbal attack.

"Why are you trying to help me, dogson!" demanded Evan.

"I hate seeing things in pain, I want to help" answered Dave.

"You seem to be a nice guy, but I hate you so instead of
flaying you alive and ripping out your eyeballs, I'll
just shoot you in the head and cut ou your heart."
replied Evan with a slight wild look in his eye.

Dave aptly replied, "Thanks!"



Author's demented notes of pain:

Everything's better with two scoops of DEATH!

okay, I'm better. Hi I'm Shan (pronounced Shawn)
or you can call me scourgey! I'm new ath tje impro game
and I hope for all our sakes that I get better at this
I apoligize for the Clown scene alone. The Vixen/Rachael
scene can be taken in any way, a friendship forged or love
announced, it's up to the writers, not me anymore . I'd
also like to wish Good Luck to Tempest on chapter 22 and
thanks to everyone who gave me advice or inspiration (You
probably don't know who you are so I'll just say all the authors
on the mailing list). I thank you all.
I didn't make it to 20k. Darn!

-Scourgey Out

*No pikachus were harmed in the making of this fic*